The End of an Era

I can’t believe it’s really over.


I spent 2 years working there, 2 years giving everything I had. In the end, as much relief as it gave me, it also broke my heart to walk away. Maybe because that’s literally what I did…I walked away. I didn’t train anyone to take my place, I just sent an e-mail & that was that. It’s such a mix of emotions. On one hand, I’m thrilled to not be in a job where I’m disrespected, distrusted & unappreciated by my boss. Not to have to worry about what kind of mood she’s in that day or who she’s going to yell at. On the other hand though, it’s sad. During the 2 years I worked there, I did everything I could to help the company, to make it thrive. I nurtured our clients & spoke highly of our products. So it’s hard to leave, knowing they are going to have no idea how to do the majority of my tasks. That my leaving so abruptly is hurting the company I helped succeed for 2 years of my life. I had to do what I did though, enough was enough.


Right now I’m sitting in a wicker chair with Ellie by my side. We’re outside a little cottage I rented for the night in Fredericksburg, Texas. I had to get away for a couple of days. Sitting in my apartment all day, waiting for my new job to start, driving myself crazy with thoughts…it was not good for me. So this morning Ellie & I drove here. It’s been a nice little break from it all. I didn’t bring my laptop (my attempt to cut myself off from the world a little). I did bring a pen & paper…I had a feeling I was going to want to write these feelings down…guess I was right.

I say a prayer tonight to my old company, that my departure doesn’t do too much damage.  That they finally get the coverage & success they deserve.  I saw a prayer to my old boss, that she finds happiness & that her & her son have a wonderful life.  Finally, I say a prayer to the new, for a fresh start, to something wonderful ahead.